Sick as a dog...

Yesterday I was sick as a dog. I mean, I could not believe it. Headache, cramping, yucky gastro-intestinal stuff. My whole body hurt. I asked my dear 22 year old son, home from Notre Dame, if he could take over for me. Without even a moan, he got out of bed and proceeded to wake up his four younger siblings, got them moving, making lunches, cut the corned beef which was in the slow cooker for Mary's "Christmas in Ireland" project, which he aslo packed up and delivered to her classroom. He then spent three hours subbing for me in the second grade classroom. (I'm the teacher's aide.) Now that's a dear son.

Today I'm quite a bit better but still limping. Just starting to try to eat some crackers and sipping coke. Dear son said he'd take the girls to school if I wanted him to but I told him I thought I could do that.

These are days when I really have to wonder what the Lord has in mind. I have a ton of Christmas shopping left to do, my house is in shambles, the kids can't find clean clothes (without difficulty), the tree is up but not decorated, My son is in a play that I need to see either tonight or tomorrow night. I really need to grocery shop..... Perhaps the Lord just want s me to fully surrender to him and realize that neither Christmas nor anything else is entirely up to me. This may be a simpler Christmas. Maybe God knew I really needed rest and only a virus would do it. I spent the entire day yesterday in bed. The kids will still have presents. Maybe not as many little fun things as usual, but they will have a few gifts. What is most important is that the love of the Christ Child be in my heart, that I love nurture, and care for my family as best I can.
Real love does not consist of a perfect, clean house and lots of presents.

Advice to myself: It is not all up to you. Ask for help. Big kids can help shop for little kids. Focus on the people you love-- listening, responding, nurturing, supporting, giving all your attention. Don't sweat the details. Allow the joy of the Nativity to embrace your heart. Your children will be as joyful as you are. This doesn't have to be like every other Christmas. It can't be. Grandpa is not here, for one thing. And circumstances have prevented the whole preparation from going smoothly (or even going at all since yesterday.) But Christmas is not all about me. It is about the Incarnation. And the love of God can fill this home and even make it the sweetest Christmas ever. May I have the humility to let it happen.